Speaking your truth: or why it’s sometimes OK to upset others

This article is filed under the “Personal” section and is written in the hope that it will help some of you (critics especially) to understand me a little better. There is method behind my madness… :-)

Last year I read the most amazing blog article by my “business guru”, Timothy Ferriss. I’ve been meaning to share it with you. It helps explain one of my motivations behind my blogs.

The original inspiring article is entitled “The Benefit of Pissing People Off” and is hosted here.

Tim’s key point – and mine- is this:

You don’t change the world by being nice.

Think for a moment about the people who have changed the world. Mandela, Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr… These people changed the world. Have you noticed how visionary leaders are usually controversial and often widely disliked in their own time.

The point I’m making is, the people we admire are the people who changed the world with their words. They aren’t usually people who “play nice”. This is an article about how to be someone who can change the world – without getting imprisoned or assassinated.

Anyone who’s known me longer than about 10 minutes knows that I’m not afraid to speak my mind. And yes, I’ve made a few enemies, especially last year when I launched my old blog.  (I am specifically referring to my public statements about another healing technique being dangerous.  Controversial, but I was speaking my truth.)

Was it worth it?
Hell yeah! Why? Well quite simply, you don’t change the world by making friends. You change the world by taking responsibility and speaking your truth. Doing this stirs up people who are making money from the status-quo, and this can make you a few enemies.
As Tim Ferris said in his blog:

Doing anything remotely interesting will bring criticism. Attempting to do anything large-scale and interesting will bring armies of detractors and saboteurs. This is fine – if you are willing to take the heat. …

Colin Powell makes the case: pissing people off is both inevitable and necessary. This doesn’t mean that the goal is pissing people off. Pissing people off doesn’t mean you’re doing the right things, but doing the right things will almost inevitably piss people off. …

Let the critics criticize. It’s the builders who count.

I have friends who are into alternative-energy production. They seriously threaten the coal industry, and they get lots of threats. I have friends that worked out how to run cars on the smell of an oily rag, and they seriously piss off the oil industry. I have friends dedicated to exposing the connection between childhood vaccines and autism, and they made a lot of enemies in the medical and drug industry. And I decided to speak the truth about a healing technique that isnt safe.

And guess what? I made plenty of enemies out of my friends in that community. Why? Well if people hear me out then they won’t make money selling stuff that doesn’t work. Coal, gas, vaccines containing mercury, Theta Healing… these are entrenched powers, money making enterprises (big or small) selling stuff that’s bad for your health.

They will fight to defend their territory, and you probably wont make friends speaking up about it. I’ve had lots of nasty and untrue things said about me since I started speaking my truth. At first this upset me, but then I saw the bigger picture.

I took a lot of comfort from the Fortune magazine article quoted in Tim’s blog post: “If you are really effective at what you do, 95% of the things said about you will be negative. Keep your head on straight, don’t get emotional, take the heat, and just make sure your clients are smiling.”

Well I’m a long way off having 95% negative said about me. At worst it’s 50/50! I guess I have a lot of work still to do to change the world!

So ladies and gentlemen, I invite you to change the world. Let go of caring what people say about you, that’s just ego anyway. Speak your mind, express your truth, and the world will be a happier place.

I highly recommend you read Tim’s full article and blog, and go out there and speak your mind! Create your own blog (it takes 15 minutes) and share your Truth.

I invite you to share your thoughts below, and use the comments section to link to your own blog (tell us what it’s about).

Blessings,
Simon

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18 Comments
March 8, 2010 in Personal update
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18 Responses

  1. “Speak your mind, express your truth, and the world will be a happier place” – lol not necessarily. I think this blog entry is utter gibberish, but I do like the rest of the RPT blog as the information helped me clear some deeply held resentment.

    [Reply]

    simonrose Reply:

    Paul – just so I’m clear, are you saying the whole article gibberish or just that one sentense?

    Reading that sentense again, I see that it’s very broad and prone to misinterpretation if read out of context.

    If you are referring to the whole article then I need to ask, did you follow the links to Tim’s blog and the various sources he cites? Are they gibberish? (Just so I’m clear.)

    I’m confused because I know how much you have benefitted from me speaking my truth about TH and many other topics, yet when I explain WHY I speak my truth in the face of adversity, you seem surprised?

    I value your opinion. And I am grateful for all your have done (away from this blog) to support our quest for truth in healing.

    Thank you my friend,

    blessings,
    simon

    [Reply]

    Paul Reply:

    I have not read the links provided, but I was referring to the suggestion that speaking your mind is generally a good thing. Many people hold varying degrees of malice within them, and it is only social, moral or legal standards which inhibit them from speaking their minds and causing offence, intimidation and embarrassment to others.

    Hitler was another historical figure who also spoke his mind. I think the world would be an even worse place if people spoke their minds without regard for what other people think. But that’s just my point of view and interpretation.

    Your old blog did help open my eyes to the dysfunction of TH, and I am very grateful for that. When you spoke out against TH you were motivated by a desire to do the right thing by helping others see TH for what it really is. To my mind it is a desire to do good which counts, regardless as to whether such a desire manifests itself through verbal expression, or through some other form.

    Best wishes

    Paul Carson

    [Reply]

    simonrose Reply:

    I accept all your points but have just one concern . To my mind Hitler was absolutely convinced that he was doing good. (I speak as the grandchild of Holocaust survivors, I have given the subject of Hitler’s psychology a great deal of thought.)

    I don’t want to discuss TH on this blog, but since you refer to it, I can tell you that it’s founder is convinced she is doing good. That may be hard for the innocent victims to swallow, but I’ve known her long enough to be sure of it.

    So we have an impasse – if the only good speech is speech for a good cause, and if everyone believes their cause to be good, then is all speech good?

    You, as an Englishment, have answered that in the negative, on the basis that “it is only social, moral or legal standards which inhibit them from speaking their minds and causing offence, intimidation and embarrassment to others.”

    I as an outspoken Aussie, agree with my teacher Tim Ferriss, that success, like freedom, requires free speech. One only hopes that the public has the discernment to find their own truth.

    This is why the American civil liberties groups had to defend Larry Flint, and it is why people like myself are fighting the Australian governments’ new internet censorship laws. Of course I’m against terrorism and child-porn but I have to fight for people’s rights to access speech I disagree with. If I didn’t, then all our freedom would suffer.

    Just my thoughts. I’m a neo-libertarian radical, you are a trifle more conservative! :-)

    End of philosophy for today, we just got back to Australia and I’m off to bed…

    blessings
    Simon

    Gayanee Reply:

    Paul I’m going to assume you are a being who’s consciously working your way towards enlightenment just as I am because you are attracted this kind of work. Being a born a Buddhist in sri lanka i was lucky enough to meet this enlighten monk when i was only 8 One thing he told me has stayed with me my whole life and I’d like to share that with you.
    According to Buddhist teachings once we let go of our physical attachments we will manifest our self in the spirit world where we are one step closer to the ultimate oneness. In this spiritual realm even though we spirit we all have a unique individual energy signature. In this realm everybody can see through your energy and know exactly what you are thinking, feeling, your desires and motivations without a filter. So being truth full is not a choice. It’s the way of life. You don’t have the choice to hold your thoughts from someone even if it’s to save their feelings as everyone sees your truth.
    He told me. “Little one I want you to live like if you are already in that world. Never hold your true feelings and thoughts from the world because that’s where you are headed”

    Just a little story a monk told me. I wanted to share that with you with lots of love.

  2. There’s one to add to your 50/50 Simon. Evidently you’re changing Paul’s world.
    Mine, too.
    There’s a lesson here and it is, I think, that we cannot be responsible for someone else’s responses and therefore can let them go. A hard lesson for a peacemaker who likes to be liked(Who, me?) but a necessary one. Last year was painful at times and exhausting at others but overall an exhilirating ride from which there was no going back. A good thing, too.
    In all honesty I didn’t know what to make of you on that first day in Liverpool and it took me a day or two to figure out how to relate to you. Again, a hard lesson for someone like me who thinks I “know” all about people immediately and mould myself accordingly in order to get along. Excuse the anglo-saxon but there’s no word that will serve for that standpoint other than bollocks. I must always find my own truth and you really helped with that process. Ta x

    [Reply]

  3. Holly Brennan Shabtai

    Loved ya from before I met ya, loved ya when I met ya even more! I can totally relate and I have learned and healed more with this modality then any of the others I practiced in the last 15 yrs combined, as have my clients and students. Keep doing what you’re doing and the rest simply falls into place.

    Truth, at least in my own experience, shifts like the wind which makes this place allot more fun then any fixed set of rules or ideas. At one point TH was a part of a truth I followed, and one of the great lessons I learned, was never again to place all my truth or belief systems (BS) in one basket,a basket that JUST IS, regardless of results and stays fixed in any circumstance regardless of the wind factor. I have found through this new found freedom which you helped inspire through your own process into RPT, the greatest amount of grace and patience for those who still hold on to their baskets. I know for me fluidity works best, but I can completely understand the fixed nature of others.

    Grace to them and you too!
    Holly

    [Reply]

  4. I think there is something very powerful and authentic about RPT too. Even though I have never met Simon and Evette, and have never taken an RPT class, the information on this blog helps me so much with various emotional issues.

    [Reply]

  5. I’ve always been a truth SEEKER. Most people are afraid of the truth. That’s because we are educated not to think for ourselves, and as a result “Most people would sooner die, than think – in fact, they do so!” (Bertrand Russell quote)
    That is why speaking the truth often offends / hurts / pisses off people. However, it hasn’t prevented me from being fairly militant in the past about honesty… and I strongly believe that it is the foundation of my deep sense of inner peace and joy now.
    I do believe though that the sharpness of truth should be tempered by a desire not to do violence (either by thought, word, or deed).
    Jesus wasn’t fooling when he said:
    “The Truth Will Set You Free”.

    [Reply]

  6. I’ve been pondering this subject some more, ever since Paul’s comments above about dictators misusing speech.

    My conclusion is this: the hallmark of an dictator is that they try to suppress the speech of others.

    Paul used the example of Hitler. What sets him apart (in this context) was not what he said, but rather his suppression of other views. The scenes of Nazi book burnings are to me a defining visual of the Third Reich (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nazi_book_burnings)

    The dictator who takes up a bit of my time these days is the creator of TH. We try not to mention TH on this blog, but it’s still relevant to a lot of people in the RPT community as half of us are ex-TH practtioners. What sets “the creator” apart is not her speech (she’s a very good entertainer) but rather her suppression of speech. The reason that most good people in the healing community don’t know what she did is that everyone who spoke up for 15 years was sued for defamation. Of course what they said wasn’t slander, but it costs $20,000+ to defend the case, so it was easier to shut up and hide. To this day most TH practitioners/teachers don’t know that all the material in the TH books was stolen/plagiarised and the original authors were basically scared off through threats and intimidation.

    That went on for 15 years and it’s only because of heroes like April choosing to lose money in order to speak the truth that I was able to find out about the 15 year history of “book burning” via abuse of the legal system.

    So back to my point, and why I disagree with my friend Paul: the truth will always set you free. “Evil” (loosely defined) can only rein when there’s a fear of speaking your truth – whether it comes by violence (Hitler) or abuse of the legal process (TH). This doesn’t mean that people say nice things, and it doesn’t mean that I like what everyone has to say about me (I don’t). But encouraging speech will always lead to a better world then suppressing speech.

    That’s my view in a nutshell. I’d love to hear other people’s points of view.

    Simon

    [Reply]

  7. I have yet to find a definite ground on whether Thetahealing would have a logical hold on me because that system defies all logic. I’m not saying I’m skeptic on it. Simply put, I’m just not there yet.

    RPT however offers something different to the table, yet, all the while, it feels familiar. I’m interested in all things logical and human, so I might have a deeper look at the ideologies of the two.

    I’ve read Tim’s article and I, for one, believe in it. No one can be complacent with one opinion. Pissing people off is just a repercussion of speaking, thinking and acting which a human being should. Thank you for featuring the article in your blog.

    [Reply]

    simonrose Reply:

    hi John, thanks for sharing your thoughts. If I can be of any assistance in answering your questions (ideological or otherwise), don’t hesitate to ask.

    The ideology of RPT is simple, You are Awesome, and miracles come from within, not from above. You don’t need any spiritual smoke and mirors. The ideology of Theta is the exact opposite “God is the healer not you” so don’t get too big for yourself! :-) Which is a bugger for Buddhists, atheists and Taoists like myself who don’t believe in the imaginary friend above. For me, it’s the Oneness that matters and you can never find that outside of yourself.

    I agree with you (and Tim Ferriss) that pissing people off is often a repercussion of speaking. I try hard to always be heart-centered or “Beingness-centered”, especially in my emails. But I seem to have a knack for pissing people off just by saying the truth. Funny that.

    Kind regards
    Simon

    [Reply]

  8. I am a truth seeker too and I agree that most people feel threatened when the Truth is in play. I found mine through connecting with Divine part of myself.
    Way to go Simon.

    With Divine Blessings
    Taja

    [Reply]

  9. simon, I’m a 28 year old energy healer. never had any formal training but just a knowing inside of me. so never charged anyone one for my services. I’ve been studying hypnotherapy and about to get my certification so i could become a therapist and healer and make a living out of what i love doing. but i had this little voice inside saying that i hypnotherapy can only take you to certain point and that there was some little piece of the puzzle missing. I don’t even know how i came across your website but i did and i’ve been really attracted to RPT. Even though i’m financially not in a place to take the class that suzanne is giving this weekend i some how came up with the money. Before i made the payment i wanted the universe to give me a sign that this was the teaching I was looking for. and i got it. i read 4 hour work week months ago. that started me on this path of finding out what I love to do and doing it while making a living. to know he’s you guru.. well that makes me want to be your student even more. i look forward to meeting you and yor wife one day

    [Reply]

  10. Hey Guys

    Remember two things – Jesus also pissed a lot of people off telling the truth.

    And Drinking alcohol never solved anything – but neither does drinking water

    Thanks for this post as we were investigating the Theta healing organization

    [Reply]

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